Kind of Moment

This post is from Chesley Polk, pictured here in his role as an Open Dream Teaching Artist. 

I know my previous blogs have been on a super positive note and so I thought I would and should use this one to discuss one of the more painful parts of this job.  You get great kids and you get troubled kids.  The thing with the "bad kids" is they aren't bad. In fact, they are usually so eager to participate that it becomes distracting from the over all lesson and so they have to be disciplined or put out.  It is heartbreaking because you know all they want is to get the answer right or be involved, they just haven't yet mastered the art of "quiet focus". (Which is truly an art).

I hate being the one to tell them to calm down or sit out because I'm always afraid it'll make them scared to participate in the future or that they'll feel their efforts to participate are unappreciated.  I struggled with how to handle this, if only for my peace of mind, and with one student I left feeling I did what I could do.  This student was so active, always raising his hand, jumping with excitement to be able to do what we were doing - but he was so active that it became distracting and he began to shout out answers, jump into the circle, etc. This, as you may imagine, makes teaching the remaining 24 students pretty difficult.  On top of that, it became clear to me that he was a ring leader of sorts. Whatever he did three or four other boys would do as well; including turning their backs from the circle. 

We had to punish him and show him that behavior would get him no where - but I couldn't get that uneasy feeling out of my gut.  A feeling that I have to say something. I pulled him aside on our last day of residency and looked him in his tear filled eyes and said, "hey buddy, you have some great ideas.  You are really truly smart and we saw you knew so much - BUT one of the tricky things you have to learn is patience and how to also be an active listener.  You are clearly a leader in this classroom.  What you do - others do. They look to you as an example. That is a big responsibility". I asked him if he could handle that.  I asked him if he could try to lead the class responsibly and set an example for the other kids.  He looked up at me, tears still flowing down his cheeks, and shook his head yes while flashing a small smile then hugged me all the way to the door.  It's such a scary thing sometimes, teaching children.  I can't help but feel pressure and a responsibility to not only teach the curriculum but help mold them into good people and at times it seems hopeless, but that little teary smile sticks with me and I know, if only for that day, he understood something and that's the kind of moments that make this job a treasure.